Journaling is an essential tool to incorporate when engaging down the self care path. It can be difficult to stare at a blank page when you first get started. Having a formula can get you on the path to regular writing. I find handwriting is the best when I’m journaling, others prefer a digital medium. I find the tactility of pen and paper can add to the experience and helps to calm my mind. Make it fun. Get a new book that will hold your precious words and get a pen in your favourite colour to make you excited to do it. Journaling has been proven to help when embarking on change, it can help guide our thoughts and reinforces messaging.

Get In Touch With Your Thoughts

Once you do it for a few weeks, you will start to see it gets easier. There is no right or wrong. No one is judging you and no one will read it unless you ask them to. The whole point of this exercise, is to get you in touch with your thoughts. I’ve even heard of others referring to it as a thought catalog. Others go beyond words and add pictures or drawings and doodles. At the core of it, make sure you are making it part of your daily routine, and you use the time to reflect.

Getting Started

My secret formula to get started is below. Set aside a time of day when you will be doing this. Block off at least 15 minutes to do it. I prefer to do it at the start of my day as part of my morning routine. I also revisit it towards the end of the day so as to leave any concerns of the day on the page, optimizing my chances of restful sleep. Schedule whatever time works for you, as long as you are consistent in putting in the effort. Then make sure you incorporate the following things in your writing:

Write down a goal you would like to tackle in the coming day or two

By writing it down it tricks your brain to make sure you do it. You make yourself accountable, just like getting a gym buddy to make sure you make it to that class you signed up for. It forces you to think about how to accomplish the goal and makes it more likely for you to succeed. If you are in a dark place, sometimes a simple goal such as as getting the dishes done, in reality can be the hardest thing imaginable. By expressing your desire to get it done, you can think of how to break it down into more manageable steps that will help you reach your goal. And if you don’t succeed, reframe it as “It didn’t go to plan, I can try again tomorrow”.

What did you accomplish

It can be meeting a deadline or something as simple as getting the laundry done today. If there was nothing you can think of for the day, you can always write about a big accomplishment from the past. By focusing on something you did that you are proud of, our brain remembers the positive feeling, and you start to look for opportunities that make us feel good. Sometimes those are little things, like being kind to a stranger. And sometimes it is massive, like that promotion you’ve worked so hard to get. Regardless of size, your accomplishments needs to be recognized and celebrated. Even if you can’t think of anything, try listing the things you did throughout the day. That can help give perspective to your use of time, and it doesn’t feel like you wasted the whole day.

Note how you feel

This gives you the opportunity to become aware of how your mind and body are feeling. It also gives you time to deal with anything negative you faced or encountered that is unresolved. By reflecting on it here, then you can tell yourself to forget about it once you are done writing. It helps your brain process the emotions, acknowledges what happened, and lets you move on. By the simple act of journaling about it, it helps you understand why you feel the way that you do. Then you can steer any actions and reactions (if necessary) in a good direction.

List at least three positive things you experienced

It can be from your personal or professional life. It can be big or small. By focusing on positive events, your mind in time will focus more on those experiences and move past the negative ones that cause you to be down. It can be something simple as getting a few minutes outside under the bright sun, celebrating a colleagues birthday, or getting a few minutes to snuggle on the couch with a loved one. The key is to identify positives regardless of how trivial they may seem.

Include at least one thing you are grateful for

Form the habit of graciousness. It helps you focus on what you do have and it takes the focus off of what you wish you had. This can be difficult at first. Think of the people you are grateful for in your life, the experiences you have, the cup of coffee you got in before anyone needed your help. There is always something you can identify, and inevitably you will find yourself smiling.

Start writing! Add sketches or photos to personalize it more.

In time, the writing becomes easier. Always try to end with something positive so that that feeling stays with you. Journaling can be truly difficult if you are self-conscious, aren’t used to writing or expressing your thoughts and feelings, or it simply feels ridiculous. But those are just judgements you are putting on yourself. Be kind, and allow yourself to put the words on paper. Journaling is simply words, in time, the words will reveal their transformative power that is greater than the sum of its parts. From someone who has struggled with this task, I am now a true believer and advocate. It’s helped me find my voice and the courage to put my words out in the world for all to see.