To live in today is a challenge for most people. Some are stuck in the past, and some can’t stop thinking about the future. Ironically, they completely miss out on today. With having to juggle busy schedules, kids and all of their activities, also don’t forget that project for work, and oh yeah, your friends also need you to help plan a big gathering. How could you possibly focus on yourself? Today is irrelevant. Everything else takes precedence. Right? Wrong. By learning to prioritize your today, you are putting yourself first. When you do that mental shift to focus on living each day, you are improving your quality of life.

Shackled By The Past

For some people, living in the past is all they know how to do. The reasons for that can vary significantly. It could be that their happiest moments were in the past, things were easier for some reason, the pace was slower so they enjoyed life more. It’s easy to see how this can keep a hold on you and you miss having those joyful moments. Sometimes happy memories of loved ones who are no longer with you keep you tied to the past too. The bond you had was so strong that it keeps pulling you back.

On the other end of the spectrum, people can be tied to their past because of trauma they experienced. Unfortunately, the younger you are when you experience trauma, the more difficult it could be to overcome. And for many, they are unaware of how it has impacted them. This can show up in different ways in their adult lives, such as in behaviour issues, relationship challenges, or even physical and mental illness to name a few. These individuals may not even be aware that their past is keeping them there. Until they do.

A major incident can trigger an avalanche of memories, or chronic stress can wear them down and make functioning difficult. Nonetheless, recovery entails that they deal with earlier trauma before they can begin living their best life in the moment. In these instances, working with a trained mental health worker will help the journey. Revisiting prior wounds can often make things worse before they get better. But finding the way to confront that past will help you live in today.

Blinded By Future Opportunities

Another problem that keeps you from living in the present day is being too focused on the future. And although there is a place for some forward thinking, that should only be used as a guide to improve your current day-to-day. For example, when you set goals, it is an aspirational view of where you want to be in the future. Then you can break that vision into actionable steps in the present. By breaking it down into smaller steps and having multiple checkpoints in between, you can ensure that you are on the right path towards your goal.

The flip side is that you can get tangled up in working hard towards those future opportunities that you forget to enjoy anything in the moment. This can become a tangled web of unrealistic and irrelevant pursuits. It can even become an obsession for some. None of this supports your ability to live in the moment.

By shifting all your attention to future outcomes, you neglect your current needs and the things that make you feel good. Over time, this will deplete your energy, your motivation, and your soul. It can also lead to destructive coping mechanisms, and your self care becomes compromised leading to both mental and physical issues. Choosing to start your life when that one thing finally happens will only lead to living a life misery. And if you never learn to live in today, when you get that future that you’ve been fixated on, you still won’t know how to enjoy your life.

Living In Today Going Forward

Once you realize that you have let the past or future take precedent over your life, you can make the necessary shift. With daily practice and a commitment to this intention, you can get to a point where you are focused on your today. Leave the past in the past, and use the future to inspire you. Stop time travelling. Live in the moment and get the most out of each day.

To live in today, you need to start implementing mindfulness throughout your day. If this is new to you, you can try one-minute mindfulness hacks, or you can use your senses to trigger it. Another way to start living in the today is by evaluating what you need in your life right now. Not what you need to do to get to that dream future, what does your mind and body need today? This can be a tough question if you haven’t considered it before. What are the major stressors that are draining your energy? What changes do you want to make in your life?

By looking at what your responsibilities and priorities are, you can find pockets of time to live in today. Those pockets allow you to pursue what makes you feel good. Slow the pace of your life. Take in the little things. Find moments of awe in the everyday. Breathe. We have all become accustomed to running around squeezing in every little thing that we can into our days, that we never question what it is all for. By forcing yourself to look at what it is that robs you of your ability to live in the today, you can eliminate what does not serve you.

Live each day to the fullest.

The past, regardless if it is good or bad, can keep you from experiencing the present. By acknowledging your past experiences, and dealing with any possible unresolved issues, you can learn to channel your efforts into living in today. Prioritizing your future life over the life you have now, can be detrimental to your current health too, both physically and mentally. You can strain relationships and compromise any potential for happiness. By releasing the hold the past or the future have on you, you can start to enjoy life.

Apply principles from your own self care toolkit, and start to dissect your life. Figure out what your next steps are. Identify what your values are and who your authentic self is. This can steer you in the direction you need. Once you know who you truly are and what are your needs, you can begin to make the right choices. Those choices will make it possible for you to live in today each and every day. One of the best ways to find calm is to focus on the now. You can’t do anything about the past, and you never know when tomorrow will cease to exist. The only for sure is the day you are in.

IMAGE CREDIT: Unsplash | Matt Seymour.