When life becomes too much, we often start to realize that we are no longer living our best lives. One factor contributing to this is not being our authentic selves. Being authentic can mean many things, but at the core of it, it means being true to yourself. Living the values you believe, and letting others opinions and expectations fall by the wayside. Being your authentic self can be challenging, especially with all the pressures and responsibilities we face daily. By taking time to reflect on this concept, you can reset and improve how you feel about yourself.
Develop Self-Awareness
Before anything else, develop self-awareness. By knowing who you are, you can actually live authentically. We become accustomed to following others expectations of ourselves, so it may be hard to know who we really are. Through self-reflection you can start to develop your self-awareness, and separate other’s beliefs and expectations. Those can be tied to your family, friends, work, culture, or religion. This may take time. Be patient. If you want to live authentically, doing the hard work up front will help you be your true authentic self going forward.
Mindfulness activities can help you navigate through self-reflection. Focus on how your thoughts can influence your actions and emotions. Then start to make better decisions that are aligned with your values. Figure out who you want to be. What are your priorities going forward?
Sometimes your actions don’t align with your intentions. Once you realize it, you can make a change. Authenticity includes knowing what your strengths are and what you need to work on. Express what you are passionate about. Find more ways of manifesting outcomes that are true to your being, and make you feel fully engaged, motivated, and happy.
Some of the reflective work will overlap with your identity, but some of this is tied to your personality. Keep in mind that your authentic self can vary based on context as well. Who you are at work does not have to be identical to who you are with friends and family. But at the core of it all will be the same beliefs and values. How you display them can be different, without compromising who you are.
Authenticity In Relationships
Searching for authenticity also makes you reflect how you are with people and which relationships are critical to your support network. Is your true authentic self someone that can relate to others? Are you in need of building or strengthening relationships? How do you need to change your behaviour to express how you truly feel towards those in your life?
A big part of authenticity in your relationships is knowing how to create boundaries and sticking to them. This allows for you to focus on your core needs. A big part of that is saying no to the things that do not serve you, and being willing to say yes when you need to be there for someone else.
When considering your authentic self in the context of others, it also means that you break down any walls you have built up over time as a coping mechanism. You have to be willing to be vulnerable in order to be open for the good in life too.
Walk The Walk, Talk The Talk
Once you are self-aware, live by your own values and beliefs. When your actions align with your thoughts and beliefs, you will experience better emotions. When you have a disconnect, it can wreck havoc on your mental state, sometimes without you knowing it. Find your own voice and speak up for yourself.
Respect yourself and those around you. Learn to accept yourself, flaws and all. That also includes being open to accepting others for who they are. No one is perfect, and by allowing yourself to be human, you can live true to yourself.
Authenticity also comes with a healthy dose of accountability. Take responsibility for what you do, and be willing to apologize when you are wrong. And one final attribute in learning to be yourself is to be able to acknowledge what is and is not in your control. This reality check will help you bridge any gaps in you being able to live authentically.
Benefits Of Authenticity
Living a life of inauthenticity can lead to major challenges. It increases your stress, and causes discord when you think about yourself. It may not be an issue in short spurts, but long-term, the effects can lead to lower self-esteem, a pattern of perfectionism, and never feeling confident in your own skin.
Some people even say they wear a mask so that others don’t know what is going on with them or to hide what they are about. But that can be exhausting. If people cannot accept you for who you truly are, then perhaps you don’t need those people in your life. And yes, sometimes it’s harder to separate from some of those ties because they are family, life-long friends, or work colleagues, but you can mitigate some of that with boundaries.
When you live authentically, you not only accept yourself more, you also feel better. In time, others will also be drawn to that authenticity because they will know what to expect from you. It also makes people take more chances on you, and they will respect when you need to prioritize yourself.
Be your authentic self.
By focusing on who you truly are and not pretending to be someone else, you are in better harmony with yourself. This leads to a better quality of life, and an overall more positive outlook on day-to-day challenges. Living authentically means you accept yourself and others. This allows you to focus on the important things and live each day to the fullest. It is hard to be authentic, but by actively reflecting and pivoting along the way, you can make great strides.
IMAGE CREDIT: Unsplash | Llanydd Lloyd.